If you’ve been asked to be a bridesmaid at a friend or family member’s wedding, congratulations! It’s an honor to be chosen to stand by the bride on her big day. That said, being a bridesmaid comes with a lot of responsibility. From attending fittings and showers to helping with the bachelor/bachelorette party and being there for the wedding itself, a lot goes into being a good bridesmaid. To help you out, we’ve put together a list of dos and don’ts for being a great bridesmaid.

Do:

Be supportive:

This is your friend’s or family member’s wedding, not yours. Even if you don’t agree with every decision the bride makes, it’s important to be supportive. She’s likely already feeling stressed out, and negativity from you will only worsen things.

In order to be a good bridesmaid, it is important to be supportive of the bride both leading up to and on the day of the wedding. This includes being there for her when she needs someone to talk to, providing advice and support as required, and helping her stay calm and focused in the days leading up to the event. On the wedding day, it is also important to be a source of support and encouragement, helping her feel confident and beautiful as she walks down the aisle. Being a supportive and helpful bridesmaid can play an important role in ensuring that the bride has a wonderful wedding day.

Be punctual:

Whether it’s for fittings, showers, parties, or the actual wedding itself, it’s important to be on time (or even early). The bride is likely coordinating many different moving parts and needs her bridesmaids to be where they’re supposed to be when they’re supposed to be there.

If you are late, it might disrupt the entire timetable for the day. Moreover, being on time demonstrates your reliability and respect for the bride’s time. So next time you’re asked to be a bridesmaid, make sure you arrive on time and help make the bride’s day even more special.

Be communicative:

If you can’t make it to something or are running late, let the bride know as soon as possible. The more she has to worry about tracking people down, the more stressed out she’ll be.

It’s important to communicate with the bride about what she wants and needs from her bridal party. It’s also important to communicate with the other bridesmaids about their roles and responsibilities. Good communication can help ensure everyone is on the same page and that the wedding day goes off without a hitch. By being communicative, a bridesmaid can help make the bride’s vision for her wedding day a reality.

Don’t:

Try to upstage the bride:

It’s her day, not yours. Leave the spotlight-hogging to someone else.

When you’re a bridesmaid, it’s important to remember that the day is all about the bride. While you may feel like a gorgeous princess in your bridesmaid’s dress, it’s not your day to shine. The bride has been dreaming of her wedding day since she was a little girl, and it’s important to respect her wishes and not try to upstage her. With that said, there are ways to help the bride feel like the show’s star without stealing her thunder. For example, you can compliment her dress or hair, help her with last-minute details, or simply give her a reassuring hug. By supporting the bride and making sure she feels comfortable and confident, you can ensure that she has the best day possible.

Get drunk:

Yes, weddings are fun, and there will likely be an open bar. But getting drunk is a surefire way to embarrass yourself and the bride. Stick to one or two drinks so you may have fun without embarrassing yourself (or the bride).

Being a bridesmaid is a big responsibility. Not only are you responsible for helping the bride to plan and prepare for her big day, but you also need to be there for her on the day itself. This means being able to support her and provide moral guidance when necessary. Unfortunately, this can be difficult to do if you are intoxicated. Alcohol can impair your judgment and make it difficult to think clearly, meaning that you may not be able to provide the level of support that the bride needs. Also, drinking alcohol can lead to embarrassing or dangerous situations, such as dancing on tables or arguing with other guests. For these reasons, avoiding getting drunk when you are a bridesmaid is best.

Be negative:

Again, this is not your day. Even if you’re not thrilled with your dress, shoes, or whatever else, keep it to yourself. No one wants a Negative Nellie in their wedding party. Here are a few reasons why you should avoid getting negative when you’re a bridesmaid:

First, remember that the wedding day is about the bride, not you. It’s her special day, and she deserves to have everything go as planned. Getting negative and acting out will only take away from her joy.

Second, your negativity will only add to the stress of the situation. The bride does not want her bridesmaids to be arguing or squabble. Keep things positive and calm, and everyone will be able to enjoy the day.

Finally, getting negative on the wedding day can ruin your memories of the event. The bride will never forget how you acted on her big day, so make sure it’s something you’re proud of. Stay positive, help out where you can, and enjoy being a part of this special occasion.

Conclusion:

Being a bridesmaid is both an honor and a responsibility. From attending fittings and showers to being there for the big day, there are many moving parts when it comes to being part of a wedding party. To help ensure things go smoothly, remember to be supportive, punctual, and communicative—and try not to upstage the bride, get drunk or be negative. With these Dos and Don’ts in mind, you’re sure to make the bride—and yourself—happy!